English by Dummies

There’s an old Pet Shop Boys clip where an old man takes a cab and says something like this to the driver: “I am a bilingual illiterate, I can’t read in two languages”.

Every now and then I find some “made in Brazil” comments on a variety of blogs, mainly in English.

Repeat after me: I will never translate what I think into another language, I will never translate what I think into another language, I will never translate what I think into another language…

If you didn’t get the point yet, it’s as simple as this: writing in Portuguese, thinking in Portuguese; writing in English, thinking in English.

I know your High School Teacher used to translate everything, probably with the help of those books in which Mr. Silva lives in Rio de Janeiro and pays his bills with Brazilian money.

Not to mention the metric system. Do you really believe Billy Bob, back in Kansas, has the slightly idea of what a kilometer is about?

When you write in English, you have to respect the language structure, the “formal slang” (I just made this up, let’s say it’s about those words that once were not grammatically allowed and today even the President would use them). You won’t accomplish that thinking in Portuguese.

The first step to get rid of these bad habits is stop doing it!

Everybody has a friend who attends to some English course. Don’t you find annoying how he keeps thinking and thinking before every one or two words?

It’s like “I am…. (ahhh or some strange “thinking” noise) from… (ahhh)”. Anyway… The guy spends more time thinking than speaking.

Let’s make a deal: the next time you feel the need to express yourself on some foreign blog, think twice. If you realize it’s going to be another translation job, give up. Our “joke subject” Nation says thank you if you stop “orkutizing” the web.